Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
