Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Randomize
