whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
