i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
