It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
