So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
