I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize
