I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
