That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
