i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's blow job season.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
True strength comes from lack of pants
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Randomize
