is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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