If i come over, it means nothing
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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