dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
