it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize