not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
