haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize
