i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
