If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
