Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
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