I look better un-naked...
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
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