Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
