Your mouth is God's brothel.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
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