everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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