Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize
