and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Operation Purity has been aborted
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
