guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize