Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
