Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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