First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
PANTIES FOUND
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