Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
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