When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
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