I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
