he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
