in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
