I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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