he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
