Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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