everyone is single if you try hard enough
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
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