Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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