we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Two words: nipple clamps
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