So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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