Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
