Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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