gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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