Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
sex in a hospital.. check
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
