I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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