Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
