Christians are straight up FREAKS
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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