Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i think my mom watched the whole time
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
You took a bar mat shot.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
My ass is underappreciated
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
