I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Drunk is not a location!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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